Is there a Doctor in the House?

There are two patients in my house that need seeing. First one would be myself, mainly my lip. I don't know what in the world is going on, but my lip keeps on swelling up! It always happens at random times too! I'm never doing the same thing! Its freakin' me out! It's actually been going on for maybe a month or two, but now its happening more often! Sitting on the couch, working in the office, meeting with the house builder, eating lunch, going to the bank...its like normal one second...strange cross between Angelina Jolie and Octomom the next! I'm beginning to think I'm allergic to something, but since I'm never doing the same thing or eating the same thing, I can't figure out what it is. For your own safety, I will not be providing you a picture.

The second patient would be my poor plant! I got it in 2007 at my grandfather's funeral, and its looked fine until about a month ago. Back in December Lance trimmed it back because it was getting so big it was taking over the living room! It didn't seem to mind then, but now, half of it is dying! I've watered it, not watered it, miracle growed it, misted it, prayed for it, sang to it, yelled at it, did some voodoo on it, put it outside, I've even grounded it from watching tv. Nothing seems to work! Can't look it up online because I don't even know the name of it!